First off your husband needs a kick in the pants!
I too have heard that people taking topamax have very serious problems with memory "normal" language issues.
Have you thought about using the lamictal alone....it too has antidepressant qualities, I take 200mg.
this is what I take and I am bipolar 1.
I also take geodon, 40mg at night... both of these meds are weight neutral. the geodon could replace the abilify(which maybe a weight gainer...don't know)...and lastly I take .5mg of klonipin to sleep.
I have been stable on this med combo for quite a while now thankfully.

I can sympathize with you lazy brain...I am resistant to try new activities, kind of like my rut but am venturing out these days...jsut this past thursday i went kayaking ! it was a lot of fun!
bizi