I'm trying to.

I just feel like I should let sleeping dogs lie, you know? Like somehow I shouldn't be rehashing old battles.

A lot of things have happened that are making me bring this to the courts' attention, so I'm sure that's part of the reason he wants to settle it without a judge. He's had a DWI, he's been reported for hitting my daughter and leaving a bruise, he insisted I take my son from him during his visitation because he "feared for his life", his girlfriend let my son play a drinking game with some friends of hers while she was supposed to be baby sitting him (and then admitted to it in writing when I demanded an apology for her lack of judgement).

He can't understand why I'm upset about any of this. (He hasn't mentioned the drunk driving arrest, but I'm sure he's aware that I know about it after seeing the lawyer. That's actually how I found out). After the drinking game incident, I said that she was not to be left alone with either of our kids ever again, but he said that wasn't my decision to make. Now she's moved in with them. These are not the kind of people I want having 50% input in how my kids are raised, that's for sure.

I just get so down when I think about the upcoming court battle, how I could be paying a bunch of money to a lawyer and still lose because my ex is so manipulative and can get lots of people to believe what he wants.