You need to learn that the word you tell yourself all the time about your own needs works on other people. The word is NO. It doesn't have to be mean or rude, just "No, I'm not able to help you right now. I'm having a hard time myself." "No, I'm not comfortable signing him in. I'm sorry if that makes you mad." "Next time you decide to take off, please remember to make sure I have a way in because NO, I don't understand."