(((((((((gimmeice)))))))) You are putting too much blame on yourself. As a mother of a 16 and 14 year old, as much as I loved it when my kids were the age of yours, I don't miss it in stressful situations. Kids don't understand that moms are human too, they don't understand stress. Of course you got irritated and frustrated--you were sad and stressed and have a full plate! Thank god you have a husband who will let you be sad for a bit and help out. Take that time. You need it. Don't do any thinking about what needs done, just relax. Recharge. Then tackle the things you have to do. Make sure you leave "beat myself up" off that list of things to do! You are so compassionate and caring. I think you could only be called "bad" in the slang form, as in "You are one bad (meaning good) person".