if you don't want the intimacy don't do it. you have to be really sure of what you want in this kind of relationship.

i'll tell you my experience. i think buddies with actual sex is not a great idea when you're a teenager, but when i was around 19 i had a similar sort of relationship, like make-out buddies. (no sex.) it was a guy i was in a band with.

for me, to be honest it was a good time, and i look back on it fondly. if you're getting something out of it, you trust the guy and there's no risk of stds/pregnancy, i don't see the harm.

this may not apply to you, but i think a lot of the advice goes against this kind of thing, without considering the fact that girls have sex drives too. people conceive of it as this situation of whether the girl is willing to do something FOR this guy, without considering that she may want to do it for herself.

it's riskier for girls because we're the ones who get pregnant, and we're more at risk for being forced to do things we don't want to do. you should be sure you know this person well enough to try to be sure these things don't happen. that's just the reality of the world we live in.

but there are safe sexual things you can do as a teenage girl if you want to, and you shouldn't be ashamed to want to, IF you want to.