(((((((((P7)))))))))))

I agree with capp. The more you try and push it away the harder it will hit back at you. Be kind to yourself. Focus on something you can do that will reward yourself. Do things you enjoy, be where you want to be. Don't force yourself to tough it out. Understand that the event has hurt you and try not to compare yourself to others who seam like they are coping.

Often I find that the anticipation of the anniversary dates are harder than the day itself. ( I have four major ones) so I have learnt over time not to allow it to have so much power. When they come up I only give myself a hour a day to stress about it. If it comes up I say to myself, that it can wait until 7pm worry time. Then I spend this worry time writing the stressful things down. If I reread them after the date I often think wow I didn't need to worry about that and the following year I often dont. This takes time and is slow process but it is working.
I hope you will allow yourself to express your emotions as they are as it is still a new place for you to be two years after the event.

Good luck and wishing you calm thought