I haven't gotten out of bed or done anything in days (except for the
essentials). I have an almost constant pain in my chest. Everything feels
hopeless and bleak. Nothing seems to matter anymore and my life feels
completely out of my control. I can only seem to motivate myself to get out
of the house for self destructive ends. This is far from the first time I've
been like this and I don't know what to do. I just don't see a satisfactory
way out of my current situation. I wish it would end...

but at least I wrote it out and had fun with smilies...