Thank you everybody!
We were able to talk about it Thursday. Both Jon and I and Jonathan and I.
It's kind of like stuff I went through in therapy, just multiplied. Start working with a T and stuff just starts spilling out and he doesn't know how to control it yet. All the feelings they weren't allowed to have all those years, flooding back. Each person getting swamped by "their" feelings - Jonathan the protector getting blasted with "angry" for example.

We talked about that and about what I went through on my journey. Jonathan was so surprised and grateful that I could put the words on what was happening - he didn't think I'd understand. Oh, honey, I do...They both agreed that they should talk to the T about this, which I think is wonderful. appointment on Monday!

But we also talked about me, and what I need, too. We discussed what had been going on and that I don't have to take that behavior. I told him that when it gets like that, if he can't control himself, that I will probably leave the situation. I still love him, I'm not leaving him forever, but I WILL leave the house if he attacks me (verbally or any other way). You guys are right - I wouldn't take this from anyone else and I don't need to take it from him.

Thank you SO much for all the support. It means a lot to me, means a lot to us.