Let me get cliche-y on you: A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
Ok, now that's out of my system, honestly the first move is the hardest. Part of it is the unknown, the fear of judgement. Part of it is like you said, admitting that it really is bad enough that you need help. If you can remember a time when you were happy, just think that you can feel that again if you reach out. If you don't ever remember being happy, then just imagine--being happy is within your reach. Obviously counselling isn't going to make you happy--it's going to be work and will take time, but there really is hope.