I'm pretty sad right now. Its a bunch of stuff that has me down. I'm trying really hard to fight my depression but I'm losing. I feel like I was doing good and then all of a sudden I got knocked over and I'm so tired of getting up and then being knocked over. I feel like every time I get to my feet someone, anyone comes and just pushes me down. I'm tired of fighting. Its draining me. I feel like I'm on my own. My family tells me to just get over it and stop being so sensitive and emotional. I try I really do. They are my biggest opponent. Its like they aren't happy untill they see me cry or give up and all of a sudden they are happy. I'm tired. I'm physically and mentally tired. I just wish I wasn't alone. I wish that someone would stick out their hand and say " I'm here, I know how you feel". I'm never enough. It's never enough. I can get tons of weight off, have my hair fixed just right, have the right amount of makeup on and have it on right and they would still find something wrong with me. God forbid my family say "you look nice". No, its always something they have to find to point out thats wrong. I litterally feel like I've been torn down and apart. I feel like I've been completely stripped and torn apart. I don't know what to do.
Then my brother disciplines my nieces too much or too harshly sometimes, at least thats my opinion. And it upsets me to watch it. Then he is constantly commenting about how much I eat, which isn't much, and when I eat.
My mom is constantly on my case about getting married. She can't wait for me to get married. She is constantly on my case that its taking me too long to get my college degree but the second I talk about not finishing she freaks out.
Then she wants me to get a house down the street from her in about another 3 years and wants me to stay living with her until I buy the house in 3 years. And if I have to listen to one more person defend my mom or whatever else I'm going to scream. I'm going to literally scream at the top of my lungs.