Hi Desertnurse...and I'm sorrry for what you and your family are suffering with. It is hard..especially for the little ones...

Professional diplomats believe in time outs. When emotions take over the conversation little can be accomplished. And the time out has to be long enough for it to do its work,,keep that in mind.

Take some time to breath,,be cordial and suportive to her. Visit the children and let them know it is NOT their fault and you love them..seek some legal advice.

In a week or two,,when emotions calm a bit..meet your wife for a quiet dinner and walk. Talk about what has happened,,how you feel and ask her what she wants with regards to the marrage.

That conversation will be the beginning of what will follow. You don;t have to solve anything right this minute.

Keep us posted.

With Care,

Lenny