thanks guys. I truely understand. I truely truely believe i found my soul mate. we acted the same , talked the same, laughed like crazy at the same things, was so in love, and had such passion for one inother, like I loved him and he loved me, it wasnt ever second guessed, or one loved one more then the other, I could have meshed in him. But I am sick and I loved him so much, I didnt want him to experience the pains of my sickness. so I let him go . out of love. I wanted him to be happy, and not have to see me sick, and be sad, or put a burden on him. But I don t think I can ever love again, like that. its gone!! once in a life time, it comes around. Some times I wish i never saw this kind of love.