Found out some more about what's going on, both on top and underneath. And it's stirring up my stuff. Life can be so cruel.
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I'd been wondering, but I was never going to ask. As a child, he was molested by his mother. I know she used to beat him but I didn't know about that. Actually, he doesn't know about that either. Jonathan does. At least I think it was Jonathan...When they get upset it can be hard to tell them apart. I know his wife sexually abused him. That's bad enough. But his mother, too?
No wonder he/they have a hard time trusting me some days.

This brings up crap for me, too. I was "lucky" I suppose - mine were "just" date rapes (mostly). I just wanna go home and hold him and cry.

You guys are all SO strong and brave. He is so strong and brave. Amazing what the human spirit can overcome, one way or another. Nobody deserves to be abused. NOBODY.