earthmama,

I hope you are okay now. I was re-reading this thread and a few things seemed so familiar to me. I remember having these episode of rage with T (that he called transferential rage). And I also remember T saying that I saw him as my abuser. This happened on more than one occasion. It took a while before I realized he was right. We unwittingly recreated interactions fron my childhood. YIKES

The only thing that really helped me was time and then reflecting and finally knowing that it WAS the transference--but it felt soooo real and I was soooo angry at him.

Be good to yourself. You deserve it.