nightmares again, REALLY disturbing and I'm crying my eyes out. I woke up panicking and all I want to do now is end my life.
WHY do I do this to myself? Every morning I wake up and tell myself "Look at yourself! You NEED to take the meds. Tonight you are going to do it wether you like it or not because you're a mess".... then it gets to taking them and I either think I can cope or I get panicky so I don't.
I NEED them, I NNED them!
I'm so ashamed of myself. I'm disappointed in myself for letting down those that are supporting me and myself! I'm seriously thinking of canceling my plans tonight so I can stay home and start my meds tonight.

Would hypnosis help? Has anyone tried it for anything? I'm really really wary about things like that, but it's meant to be very useful with overcoming fears?

Oh well .... another day to get through now...