Oh sweety! It's so hard. I know it is. And you are so brave--you survived the toughest deployment ever. So why are you so upset about a weekend drill? Because it's a trigger. Because of everything else you are going through. Because you love him. Because an Army Wife is the hardest job in the Army. Reserves or not. It's hard. (I was a Navy wife for years, trust me, I know). You are blessed that he holds you and comforts you (I never got that), so when he comes home open up to him and tell him exactly how you're feeling--and if you don't know, tell him that also. And when he comes home, please give him a hug from me and thank him for serving. Then hug yourself and thank you for being an Army wife.You have every right and reason to feel how you do, don't belittle your feelings, honey.