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my oldest daughter began to struggle with fear/anxiety abruptly at age 9. she had a stomach "bug" and suddenly was afraid of germs and got extremely controlled by this anxiety and tried to stay home from school with "stomach aches" and various ploys to stay at home in a "safe place".
her situation was no where as near to the level of fear your son experiences. BUT, the one thing i can share with you is what i wish i had done differently - that old "hind-sight is 20/20".
i took her to easter seals to a child therapist who had a play therapy approach. we went for about 6 months and it didn't seem to help. I WISH I HAD KEPT LOOKING FOR HELP. we were very broke, as we had chosen for me to stay home with our kids and that was a consequence we had to deal with. but i wish i had kept looking.
my daughter is 26 now and i recently found out how much she still suffers from fears and insecurities. i felt really bad when i heard that and how much she had just tried to cope on her own. i suffered from depression and PTSD and DID and a few other things and this was the best i managed and i am encouraging her to get into some short term therapy because her new job as a first year special education teacher is pushing the old anxiety buttons pretty hard.
your son is fortunate that you care and are paying attention. i can see your concern for him. i hope you can find something to help him. i've had some strong bouts with anxiety at times and it can feel like mental torture. all the best to you!
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  HEALING HAPPENS
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