I really appreciate the article on resilience. It does point out the concepts that I have been trying to understand for a while. However, I wish my resilience had continued through the other side of the trauma & not just during it. I guess that my Mom's death at the end of the trauma of living through & handling every aspect of her identity theft which even though it was only over a period of two months took its toll on the resilience I had finally recovered over the previous 1 1/2 yrs.

During the first 2 weeks of the trauma my resilience seemed to be there in order to have a counteraction to everything that was going on even though I didn't know what I was even up against. I was trying to figure out what was going on under my nose, & since it was so bizzar, it was hard to get anyone to believe what I was talking about. Then getting accused by the police of abusing my mother was even more unbelievable. It wasn't until I was finally able to report everything that went on to the authorities that I still sat back & couldn't figure out the whole strategy that had been used on my Mother & myself. Even 4 months later & 2 months after her death, I still don't understand the picture. Before this all hit, I had gotten to the point where my weight was stable & my eating & exercise program were not conflicting, but leaving no reserve must have left me physically vunerable.

For some reason when it all started hitting, nausea set in & threw off the whole weight issue. During the initial trauma, I took it minute by minute but found that I was having no time to even eat let alone fighting the nausea that I was experiencing. By that time my Mother was back in the hospital, & I was trying to keep her & myself safe from anything else the RN could do. Spending 24 hrs a day in the hospital with my mother while I knew she was dying & she kept asking my if she was going to get better just added to the stress. I think that having no physical reserve left me open to having my resilience fly out the door just at the time my Mother died. I have had medical hospitalization after hospitalization & test enough to rule out anything physical except for how my body ended up reacting to the stress or is it how my mind finally ended up reacting to the stress. The nausea will not go away even with heavy duty meds used for chemo patients & eating & drinking is a struggle with only my mind to be blamed for it at this time. But all I want is have my life back similar to what it was, spending time with my now 6 month old filly & my 11 american eskimo dogs, riding & practicing my dressage riding. I hate the struggle against the nausea when a great meal is staring me in the face & wanting so to enjoy it.

I am hoping that my resilience makes it back soon because no meds nor anything else seems to make a difference in the situation. The determination to recover is probably the only thing that will win in the end.

There is so much to the concept of resilience in our recovery to our illnesses that is should never be discounted.

Debbie K