I don't buy the idea that you are a failure. Whose standards are you using? Do you think that it all started with your parents lack of attention and you are just continuing to replay that in your head? Your parents weren't paying attention because of their own problems. They didn't pay attention because something was wrong with you. I had this same problem growing up and I put the problem right where it belongs - with my dysfunctional parents...... Throw out that recording that keeps telling you that you have little value. Start acting like you are valuable because you are........