I love porn. I used to hate it, it used to make me feel ugly and I used to think that my man got off to it because he found them attractive - and I look nothing like those actresses so that must mean that he doesn't find me attractive; or that it's a form of cheating.

I think that's the reason why so many women can't enjoy porn. But ladies, once you find porn that appeals to YOU - you will change your mind and you will understand what it's about. And trust me, once you understand it, you won't feel self conscious anymore and you won't consider it cheating. There is SO much more out there than that mainstream Valley porn with big titted size 0 girls who shout "Oh yeah! **** that ***!!", you just have to look in the right places. I suggest you do so!!

I haven't bought my man any porn, cos come on.. we live in the 21st century, no one BUYS porn anymore. I have, however, given him my login name and password for a site that has some awesome movies. Yeah, I pay for my own porn and share it with him - cos we both like the same things. It's great for foreplay and for getting ideas, plus I've learned so much about my own sexuality from exploring the world of porn.

Septembermorn; talking about addiction in the context of porn isn't exactly fair. Would you ban alcohol from your home just because someone might become addicted?

Rhapsody; I disagree completely. Porn is fun cos it turns you on, and since men generally require visual stimuli (as opposed to women who generally stick to fantasies) - porn is a natural thing for them. Most men can't get off from just fantasies. It has nothing to do with taboo or secrecy. I've shown my man lots of porn "here honey, this one looks good" - and he'll even ASK me if I know any good movies, usually he wants something with women who look like me (dawww) and I'm always happy to help him find something.

Salukigirl; you should definitely find out what kind of porn he's into. Maybe do a quick search on his computer when you get the chance. Few people are able to be completely honest about their fantasies, fetishes and preferences. Porn is just about getting turned on and getting off, nothing else. But you MIGHT be in for a surprise if you find out what turns him on. And magazines are lame and useless, get him some movies instead. I suggest you even watch them with him if he's comfortable with that; then it won't be about him getting off alone to it - he'll include you in it and you probably won't even finish the movie.
But don't go out buying a movie before you find out what he's into, cos he might not like the movie at all. Just discretely slip it into a conversation when you're in bed, just ask him what he thinks about this and that or if there's anything he would like to try or if he have any fantasies.

But like I said, you might be in for a shock. One of my ex boyfriends told me that he had necrophiliac fantasies - involving both "sleepy sex" and corpses... I obviously couldn't deal with that, but I'm glad that he told me.