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multipixie9 · Nov 17, 2008, 11:48 PM

the 3 posted answers above me are EXCELLENT AND WISE. they have covered the answer well, so all i have to add is what happened when i did not wait to confront my dad about a sexually crude remark he made about my body the last time i hugged him for many many years (as a 14 year old)

i called, sometime in my 30's, very early in my healing journey and told him what he had said to me, i won't repeat it here. his response was, and i quote, "hunh, i must have been really drunk, i don't remember saying that." end of quote, end of discussion, not the end of the pain and anger i felt. the validation of my feelings didn't come, the apology i hoped for did not come. i walked away with one more wound to recover from.

i love my dad and was able to forgive him. my mom who was very controlling and very demanding died before i was well enough to think of confronting her. so, i have had to do a lot of healing on my own - something that many of us have to do.

i wish you all the healing there is and hope you may come to a place of deep peace concerning your past. Timing Is Everything!