zigmund, issues of gender can be very confusing because sometimes there is not an absolute right or wrong. Personally, I believe people can identify with both genders and they don't need to force themselves to live as one or the other.

I have identified with a lot of masculine traits/behaviors because they seem most natural to me. But, at the same time, I identify myself as a woman and I no longer question my gender because I think that the masculine part of me and the feminine part of me can coexist.

I think society is more confused about my gender than I am--they seem to want me to pick one or the other. I think that is because they don't know how to treat me if I am "something in between."

Most of the time I dress like a man but I also feel okay in a dress. For me, neither one of them are right or wrong. In some ways, it is kinda nice to have all my options open and to embrace any aspect of either gender. That does not make me confused about my gender--that is how I have integrated the masculine and feminine aspects of my own gender identity.

It took a long time for me to work all this out in my head and then to accept it without judging myself. It took even longer for me to feel comfortable enough to express my gender to others.

I can't give you an answer, but I do know that this is something that will take some time for you to figure out. Don't rush yourself. If you do strongly identify yourself as trans, remember that you can always change your mind. You are not locked into just one identity for the rest of your life.

I have learned to express whatever part of me feels natural at the time and to accept that my gender identity fluctuates. Above all, there is not a right or wrong way for me to be and I don't have to declare or justify my gender to others.

PM me if you want to chat.

I hope you can work this out enough so that you can have some peace of mind.