i know,me too--i struggle everyday--to be or not to be---i have lost family and friends,it's just me and my dog again now.i wish i had some words of hope,all i have for now is empathy and commiseration.i i have hope for you and others though,just not for myself,if that makes any sense ?? i'm not making much sense lately,but just know i've been there,and am there so i do understand,ok??