hangingon, my first T was a woman, and I saw her off and on for about 9 months. I found her through my employer's EAP, and they gave me 3 names only, all female. I felt I didn't want a male because I was really devastated by my husband's betrayal and was so hurt, I just didn't want a male. Later, after I stopped seeing my female T (who was fine, but I didn't bond with her or anything, she just couldn't help me move forward), my sister pushed me to go see another therapist that she had heard about, who is my current T, a male. I was hesitant for the same reason as before, but I was feeling stronger so decided to meet him. We bonded instantly and intensely, and the fact that he is male has never been a problem. In fact, I think that his being male has been very healing for me, because I have formed this caring and trusting close relationship with a male, so it has helped me get over this distrust of males caused by my H's treatment of me. I am not sure I could have gotten the same degree of healing from a female no matter how good she was.