Thank you, everyone. Yes, your words helped.
I did see my lawyer today and told her I wanted to be the one to go to the courthouse. So she and I will go shortly after the first of the year. If my H and his lawyer want to come along, they can, but it really takes just one party, my lawyer said. The judge will ask us some questions to make sure I agree with all that is in the legal documents and then I think that will be it.
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Does needing to go to the courthouse depend on whether or not you and your ex are agreeing on everything?
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allabout, my H and I are working stuff out in advance and will sign the papers together with our lawyers and then later one of us will go to the courthouse. I don't know how people do it who do not work everything out between themselves beforehand. But my L said that at minimum one of us has to go to the courthouse.
I had always pictured, that if I did go to the courthouse, that I would go to the big courthouse downtown, where I have served on jury duty twice and went to my court-ordered parenting seminar. I was just there last week for something. It's an old building with polished wood benches in the courtrooms, marble floors, ornate chandeliers, etc. Lots of history there. But my L works in an outlying suburb, so we will go to a satellite courthouse near her office, where a magistrate comes just twice a week. It's not what I pictured--probably more of a modern office building, etc., without the history and stature of the other place. But my L said the wait will be shorter, and her time is my money, so yeah, let's do it!