i couldn't agree more with Lenny's statement. he is right-on. especially in that you began your post in saying that what you are doing is wrong, yet you completely justified your position throughout the rest of the post. i wonder who you are trying to convince that the relationship you have is solid, us or yourself?

i agree that no one has the right to judge you. however, there are plenty of red flags in your post. one is that you say that the man your involved with told him he is not physically intimate with his spouse. i have to tell you, most men who are unfaithful to their spouses will make that claim. that statement is to be expected, it's so cliche. and i can understand that you are happy and feel loved, however, wouldn't you like to have a committed relationship that excludes others? do you trust this person? if he was willing to cheat on your friend and on his spouse, it's not hard to determine what kind of person he is.

i disagree with your claim that it was your boyfriend's and girlfriend's fault that you got involved with this man. as individuals we have complete control over the decisions we make. we must take responsibility for our actions. no one can tell you what to do, we can only send good wishes your way and wish you the best in life. best of luck to you.