Owl, I am sorry...... From all of the stories that I have heard this is usually what happens. My belief is that our parents are what got us to this point (either they didn't protect us or didn't teach us that we could protect ourselves, they didn't give us the right upbringing so that we would have coping skills and the ability to problem solve and work through our emotions, etc., or just basically didn't support us enough...) So, therefore, if their lack of parenting got us to where we are then they will not have the personal skills to handle what we need from them at this later point in life.

You can still heal even if your mom doesn't give you validation on this....