Hey. I'm sorry you are feeling like that. There is hardly any useful advice I can give youo.. but at least I'll try to briefly answer some questions.

I'm not making a choice to live.. I'm just not doing anything to stop living, which is good.. they say. I would click "no" if there was this windows-like yes/no question every morning at 600AM, but there is none.
Nothing motivates me to make an effort in life - I just follow my checkpoints. You know.. Sleep-Work-Sleep-Repeat scenario because everything else causes trouble. I don't think - I just do.
I have to get out of the bed every morning to go to the toilet ,then stop my headache - coffee does the job, then I'm trying to work to keep myself busy.
Yes, deep inside I want to live, but definitely not like this. Not even close.

Yes, I remember the feeling. Unfortunately my question is much more specific now.