Ah Troy...
If its made it's way to just under the skin/under the surface then it is time for it to break out and drain the poison that traps us in a vicious cycle.
A cycle of self hatred, shame, guilt, and hopelessness.
There ain't gonna be anyway of stopping it, either. We can run and run and it's still gonna be there waiting.

Jme, but it wasn't until I ran into an ignored brick wall did anything change...least expected is putting it mildly.
In many ways, I wish I had made the choice to stop keeping secrets about the war episodes.
I didn't make that choice for many reasons, and I ended up in bits and pieces...putting the puzzle of me back together. Some of those pieces are not nice and neat and tight, either.
Never will be...that does not mean I am damaged goods/bad person/sicko. It means I'm a human being living and loving and laughing, and accepting who I am.

Making peace with the reflection in the mirror is hard, I know. Not doing it makes life harder than it needs to be...

Cap