my mom died of breast cancer, it was widely spread before she got to a doctor. she'd had some symptoms for over 18 months before she discovered a lump in her breast. even then she put off going to doc for another week.
i need to get a mammogram and a full checkup, whatever you do for a woman who's had a hysterectomy. i have neglected these exams because it triggers my alters soooo much. i feel i am behaving stupidly but the fear and hesitation to go do it is freaking strong!!!!
i need some mental help with this, not just another "suck it up and don't be stupid" lecture from someone at the doctor's office. i know good and well it is stupid to put it off but i have no one to go with me and i can't do it without anti-anxiety meds. i just realized i need to ask my daughter sarah to take me. she would do it willingly and not begrudge the time and effort, besides she hates her job, she'd probably love a day off (LOL). silver lining to every cloud, hunh?
leslie and the pixies
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