My mother committed suicite when I was 15 after many attempts. I also had a few attempts before I had my first child then I restrained myself for my children's sake & sometimes I was literally locking myself in a closet crying all night (bipolar 1) to keep myself from ending my life.

I was good to my vow until 2 1/2 yrs. ago. My children are now 31 & 29. I don't know why I broke that vow, but I did an overdose. I'm still reeling & trying to recover from that. The fear that I could get so desperate to break that vow when I know how devastating a mother's suicide is to her children & I love my children so...