I've been busy lately, that's why I haven't updated myself on this thread - but wowie!
Is it awful to say that I'm glad I'm not alone in this?? xD So many great answers here, and I'm glad that we're all hanging in there - painful as it might be!

FIffyChic, great advice! I try to change things up, but it's easy to fall back into the routine.

Bizi: I've only been on Lamictal for three months and I know that the maintenance dosage is 2-400mg. I saw my doctor last month and said that I wanted to increase my dosage, just for the sake of it, and he suggested that we wait and see how this current dosage will work out (if it's working or if I'm just hypomanic).
If I get depressed, I've got plenty of mg to go on. And yes, I am on antidepressives - but only 5mg of Cipralex, just to give it a tiny boost 'cause at the moment I don't need that much. Hypomania isn't a problem, it just means that I'll finally clean my apartment. So far, so good anyway. I've gone through sadness and suicidal thoughts WITHOUT ending up as a depressed mess with a noose around my neck - and that's huge. I'm seeing my physician again soon and I'll tell him about it then and see what he has to say. (my blog's been updated btw)

Multipixie9, I'm glad that you've found your reason - I'm not religious (agnostic) but I'm all for religion and faith if it helps you. But faith HAS saved me once or twice, it's very powerful.

Cthomas, that's what I've been clinging to since I was 9 years old - hope. Some day things WILL get better, and I WILL be happy and I'll look back on these years and think I was incredibly silly, and I'll love being alive.. I hope.

My mother is also a very important reason, in fact - she's the ONLY reason I'm still alive. She's my hero, I love her to bits and pieces, and she's sacrificed so much for me - and the thought of what my suicide would do to her breaks my heart, I can't do that to her.
My sister's mother killed herself, and I saw what that did to my sister. I have also lost someone to suicide, and it's awful - there are too many questions and too much blaming yourself.

And yeah lol, it's too much of an effort to kill yourself. Too much planning and too much cleaning needs to be done - I can't be bothered.