|
a written forum has limitations in communicating meaning and in demonstrating someone's experiences to other people. subjects that are emotional and /or spiritual may be hard to convey to other people. i sometimes feel frustrated when i have attempted to share something important and come up short in helping people understand exactly what i meant. i think this is just the way it is when we express ourselves in words on anonymous computers. but hey, it sure beats nothing! it is awesome to share with people from around the world.
in recent years i have experienced forgiveness in powerful ways. i forgave abusers and their offenses stopped haunting my mind and emotions. it seemed like invisible, spiritual chains dropped off me and so i said: forgiveness frees me.
my forgiveness DOESN'T relieve abusers of one scrap of accountability for their actions - legally, morally, spiritually. i believe the offenders will face God someday. when i forgive i am free to NOT be judge, jury, jailor. this leaves my emotional/spiritual/physical energy free for the healing process.
over the past few years my belief about forgiveness has changed substantially. i thought it meant i was somehow not wanting them to be responsible for their actions/harm. i think i have changed my understanding. forgiveness is part of the work i do as i proceed to heal. i think taking responsibility is the offender's work if he/she ever wishes to become something more than an offender/criminal.
when i was abused i was trapped in an invisible prison. the offense, my feelings of hurt, shame, anger, pain forged bars that held me prisoner inside the experience of abuse. all i ever really wanted since then was to escape that prison and walk free of my past. for me, forgiveness is one of the tools that will unlock my cell and release me.
__________________
  HEALING HAPPENS
|