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*hey, i like the new font changes and stuff, all this fancy stuff is new to me...i like*
I wanted to go ahead and get started on spilling my guts about the whole new situation that had occured and embedded myself into my life while I was MIA from PC these last couple months. It's been absolutly chaotic. But things are looking up, I guess that is what matters.
Well, I'm going to attempt to brief this up the best I can.
We all know I left my husband. In that process the custody for our three and four year olds began and of course it was a ugly or deal. Many times the cops were involved. Some violence, all sorts of drama and bs I wouldn't wish upon anybody. In the end though we realized what were doing was hurting our children. Now we split them on the weeks and weekends and we share responsibilities. For the most part it is better, because I get to see my babies.
Long long long ago I made posts about my best friends husband and how we had a very minor attraction and a one night stand while him and his wife were together. Well, his wife left him for another man and we ended up hooking it. Much happened very quickly because already we are living together in our own apartment. He was my friend long before my mate. Although we are much in love and have all sorts of good times together, it can be rough to. Like for example, there was many things about him I didn't know while in our friendship and the very beginning of our relationship. I'm sort of side swiped with some of it. It makes me nervous that I might be making the same mistakes again. I can get into depth about some of that stuff later though.
I do miss my kids a lot. Sometimes I feel my actions have harmed them in many ways. My boyfriend and I are married to other people. Sometimes it feels temporary and sometimes it feels for forever, very confusing. But, I'll long for my children so much that I'll even consider living a life of misery with my husband just to be with them. I feel happy that I found love, but I feel absolutly lonely and empty with my children not being with me at all times.
Anyway.....long enough, just wanted to get that out on the table.....thanks, whew, I feel relieved.
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