Welcome Saving........you're not stupid or a pain. Like everyone has said, we are a great group and would like to help in whatever way we can.
I understand what you are going thru with cutting. Personally today I spent the whole day wanting to cut while I was at work - I even imagined myself doing it at my job - just to release the stress/pressure I feel inside. I wonder half the time why people are nice to me as well - obviously I don't see what they do.
You aren't alone. How often do you cut and how deep? Have you talked to anyone like a therapist? If you need someone to talk to, just send me a message, and we'll chat.
Please keep coming here and let us help.
Mary Alice