Its totally understandable, I grew up being regularly physically abused & it messed me up. But my sister who was never abused felt neglected by not being abused, she thought our father didn't care about her as he wouldn't hit, yell at or denegrate her. She thought that the lack of abuse showed he didn't care enough to be agro at her. In a abusive household all suffer whether thay are the object of abuse or not.