Darling ((((((((((Christina))))))))))

So sorry you had to go through this
but you have done really well.
Also sorry we didn't see the original post until now.

Remember that dissociation is a normal coping mechanism for humans, so don't worry about that part of it

Take gentle care of yourself, & it is NEVER your fault if you are assaulted.
It took us a long time to learn to believe that about ourself. It's strange , isn't it ? If this happened to someone else, you wouldn't dream of blaming them, but when it happens to you it feels different & unfortunately the police can be very insensitive sometimes. Glad that you had friends to help.