hmm...curious to be honest your post and folks' comments have me a little curious myself..

first, i totally understand how you feel. definitely not alone. i recently started a thread myself i'm confused? don't understand DID some people have posted some great information. you may want to take a look.

i used to be in therapy - can't afford it now. literally can't afford food now. but, whenever i've looked back, i've never been able to remember what i discussed in therapy (not sure if i remembered at the time?)!

i always just thought to myself that whatever i said wasn't important or that i didn't say anything. i know the therapist i went to the longest...i never talked. i do remember him saying i was his quietest patient. so i guess i figure i really never did talk...

there were essentially three T's that i saw for an extended period of time. i was young - teens. so i also figured i just forgot what i said. the last i saw i was 19-20. i don't remember specific conversations...i know we talked about school and i know i shared with her about my SI (i remember brining in an article from a magazine...SI was a fairly new thing in the public eye back then)...i know i talked about family... but i don't remember specific conversations...

this is kind of freaking me out a bit now... i hadn't given it much thought before. always making excuses... wow... i had NEVER thought i dissociated?? what if i did??

didn't mean to turn my comment to you to something all about me! but it freaked me out reading your post & everyone's replies to you...

i can REALLY REALLY relate to your worrying about you're hiding. it's a scary thought not knowing if there's something we don't remember... i'm scared too.

you aren't alone!!