((((((((((((( chrise ))))))))))))))

I agree with the others that you need to reach out for others irl. Do you have a mental health center in your community? A lot of those work on sliding scales based on your income or lack of one. The one here even has a walk in clinic once a week so it would be something worth checking into. For me it was easier to reach out to a professional then it was to talk to someone I know, if that's not the case for you then try to talk to someone you know.