Echos, I can so relate. I have yet to get angry in therapy, she has never seen my anger. Part is due to having a really hard time letting her see the real me.
She asked me last week if I wanted to scream, I said no, you won't catch me doing that. She said do you want me to help you, I just laughed.

I don't even show anger outside of therapy. She thinks that perhaps I am afraid of it. I decided early on that I didn't want to act they way my step- dad did. She assures me that its ok to get angry that it can be expressed much differently than how it was portrayed to me growing up. I guess I am not comfortable with it.

Like you, I so want to be able to open up, to be free in a sense, whether it be showing my frustration or even my fears.

Ps....I definately feel more comfortable outside of session. There is something about being one on one and being asked to share deep things that gets to me, I hate attention being on me. In fact even outside of T, for instance when someone tells me they are sorry about my mom's death I say thank you and I change the subject rather quickly.

Hangingon