Starchaser, hunny, you are wise to acknowledge that you feel these doubts about the relationship with this young man. First, I have to say that the "friend" you were visiting treating you very callously. Not much of a friend. The young man you met was there for you...yes, but you were in emotional crisis. It is kind of troublesome to me that he is so insistent on being in love with you while you are struggling with all kinds of issues. I understand that you do not want to hurt him, but you may be wise to postpone this visit with him if you feel so unsure of your own feelings.
Here at PC, we have the "Survivors of Abuse" thread. I, and many others post there with thoughts and concerns. I invite you to do so as well.
Also, feel free to PM me at any time.
Love
patty