i have been in the lifestyle for little more than a year. i am an adult little girl. i've seen the evil in the lifestyle and the pure love.

my advice to you - especially if you are looking at yourself as a submissive - is to do research. lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of research.

do NOT go straight into the BDSM dating sites... you can and will get hurt.

be very leery of people. keep yourself safe! never ever ever meet someone without letting a good friend know who you are meeting, where, when, etc. and have a safe call.

use safe words!!! as mentioned before "RED" is universal meaning stop!

know what your limits are. i once - naively said during a chat that i didn't have limits (i mean what could possibly be done during a chat, right?!) i started writing what was said but i can't.... just suffice it to say - it hurt.

you must know what your limits are.

and before people jump up and down and say "see. see. how sick and twisted BDSM is!! In 2006, there were 272,350 victims of sexual assault. and someone is raped ever 2 minutes. they aren't all bdsm folks! there are sicko's in the vanilla world too.

STAY SAFE!

having said that...my very two BEST friends in the world i met through the lifestyle!! they taught me how to accept love and to trust. it is a wonderful lifestyle, in which communication is not just nice - it is expected and essential!

check out fetlife it's kind of like a myspace for kinky people. it's very active and there are groups to join and ask lots and lots of questions. you can meet others who feel the same way you do.

also check out leathernroses.com and bdsm-resources.com (just two i can think of) there was one called castle realm but i don't think it exists anymore. for info.

stay safe