I'm fed up of being beaten down. I'm fed up of it!!!
I would be tempted to say that he (sometimes they) always do it when I'm at my worst, but that's not true. It's constant. Just beats me down more when I'm at my worst.
Do I really deserve it? Am I really that bad? What's it gonna do to me when I leave home? I don't want to turn in to 'that'... it scared me the other day. I did something he'd do... so punished myself. I don't wanna be him. I don't wanna be anything like him. I want to get as far away from him as I can... but i can't.
I hate that he's a big part of my depression now. I'm a robot when he's around, not a person.
Can't type anymore....
....