I think you are doing amazing!! You have come so far!! Your attitude about life is so different than before, you are starting to believe. You are using the tools (people) that you have. You have us and you have your key worker. Sweety, I think you are wonderful!! I think you are gifted and I've told you before I think you shine! This pain and anger and frustration is normal for what you've just been through. Stand your ground and lean on us. Let Sam and anyone else say what they want--no means no and you were right.