Hmmmm, cause for pause.

Well, I'm staring at this little box not really sure what to say. I have many thoughts, but I think ultimately it's up to you to figure out if you have issues of unforgiveness toward this person. I believe the body holds trauma and if you were too young at the time to really understand what was happening, perhaps massage therapy would help with the physicality of it all. You didn't necessarily present that as an issue, but is it? I think it's something to think about.

Children don't think the same as adults do so it was more of an experience and trauma of your emotional psyche. Something in you knew it was wrong but couldn't necessarily articulate "why", I think. This therefor makes it more difficult to come to terms with. My mother died when I was a toddler. I have one memory of her alive and I remember the funeral...I remember what she was wearing and I rememeber feeling hungry. I felt guilty about this for a long time, I mean really, HUNGRY at your mommy's funeral??? Well, I discovered it wasn't a hungry of the tummy, it was a hunger for my mother, I knew I felt "empty" inside, I knew there was a "void" in my life. I knew I needed nurturing and couldn't get it. So you see, I ate myself up for years over this, now I know better. But I will also say that this experience left me with years of food issues because as a little girl I did turn to food to comfort me. I use to sneak down to the kitchen in the middle of the night and steal cookies and stuff from the kitchen and bring them to my room and hide under the covers devouring them. It was a substitute for the love that had gone from my life. Now, I don't have any of these issues anymore. I'm healthy, I eat right, and like I said in another post, when I'm in the depressive swing of the pendulum I allow myself certain "treats", but always in moderation.

I don't know if this helps you at all AG. I feel for you for what you went through. Life can be so cruel. My best advice is take this and see what good you can use from it, perhaps to help others, or even children. But ultimately you must figure this out for yourself. I don't want to put thoughts in your head that don't belong there, which is why I chose to share my own experience.
TgrsPurr. xoxo