|
Dec 13, 2008, 08:19 PM
|
 |
|
|
Member Since: Oct 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 8,135
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannah
Maybe what is so uncomfortable for people with these boundaries is that you expect people to be happy when you draw a boundary against them. People are not happy being told no but how else do you stand up for yourself. You have to be comfortable standing up to people and making them unhappy or you won't be able to set your boundary.
|
I guess for me I was taught that you put the needs of others first , that you were selfish if you wanted anything for yourself - also when your needs are not met as a child i think that teaches you that (me) your needs are not worthwhile, that you are not worthwhile,
its' a bit like what i was told to do on a bus - my mum said you stand up for someone older or younger than you - great! unless someone the exact same age as me gets on I stand up!!! the same with needs and boundaries - I was taught that other peoples were far more important than mine - if there was a place behind last I would be there waiting to let someone else take my place LOL
|