I also wanted to say that I am tired. I am angry that I am so broken. I am mad that this happened to me. I am going to take yoga in jan as a way to get back in my body. My T gave me gloves because when things get to strong I dig my nails in my hand. My other T has me draw on these huge peices of paper and that helps alot to get anger out. I am on anti anxiety pills. The dr that hung up on me called me and said she was sorry and she wanted me to come back. I want to hurt myself more then I dont and I dont know why. I cover myself up with the blanket my T gave me and hang on to the bear she gave me and the gloves and when i go to Therapy i try and talk to the anger out. there is so much more to my anger then people know. My mom starved us locked us in our room with no food. she put a lock on the fridge so we couldnt eat. i was so skinny you could see every bone in my body. The lengths I had to go to for food was sad. So much more but I wont talk about it now. Now she is dying and ugggghhh I just cant figure it out. By the way when cps finally took me away aftr my mom shot at the cops I weighed probably 30 somthing pounds at 9 and she weighed over 300.