MINIME, no-one should have to put up with what you put up with - it sucks bigtime

I am sorry that you are having such a difficult time at the moment but am glad that your 2 t's are there for you - they seem to care a lot. It must be hard with your mum - my dad died of cancer and I had to take his calls (guess I didnt but i felt i had to) and visit him even though he had done terrible things - it takes a toll - but talk it out with your T's they can help you - you sound like you have some strategies in place to help.

and always remember that you are a kind caring and compassionate person who deserves to have a good life - When you get the urge to hurt yourself ask yourself what would you say to a friend in your place? I have done that on a couple of occassions and it has stopped me from doing self harm - most of all know that we are here for you - we support eachother so we can fly