I found out today that the guy who was the manager at the recovery house I moved out of in May killed himself a month ago. He had over a year sober but relapsed after moving into an apartment with another guy who i was there with too and the one guy went away with his girlfriend and came home and found him dead - he had killed himself. it's really hard to believe. just shows you how serious this **** is.

My ex-roommate from the recovery house moved into an apartment in Philly not far from me and I went over there yesterday and stayed the night. We watched a couple of movies and hung out. We watched Get Smart and City Hall. Did a lot of talking about staying sober. Helped me feel stronger about choosing sobriety and gave me some hope because he himself felt that there was no light only about 6 months ago. That's how I feel right now. He is coming up on a year next month. Of course I have a week today after blowing 7 1/2 months clean back in May. We had called the assistant manager from the recovery house to say Hi and that's how we found out today.

Just really hard to believe and sad. Scary too. I just feel strange after hearing about this being I was only in the psych ward myself a month ago after becoming so depressed about relapsing. It's like a what point does a person become safe in sobriety? I guess never is the answer.