sometimes things just 'click' huh. i remember when a similar thing happened with me... my therapist was like 'can you promise me not to self harm this week' and i was like 'i'll do it for you'. i thought somehow that that wasn't a good reason. my therapist said 'yeah, ok, you do it for me. and we will work on your doing it for you'. i was really surprised at her response...

Linehan has this speel somewhere about how sometimes clients / patients (whatever lol) start out doing things for their therapist. they exercise for their therapist. they get out of bed in the mornings for their therapist. they stop hurting themselves for their therapist. she says the initial reason doesn't matter why... just the move of doing it means that the patient / therapist can work together in figuring out effective alternative coping strategies. and then over time... eventually... once the coping strategies are in place... the client does it for them. but that latter thing takes time, yeah.

(bit like how when people get to a certain point of starvation it affects their thinking such that they are simply unable to eat for them and its about kind of using any means necessary to get their body weight over that threshold such that then their doing it for themselves is an option).